Night, while FB-ing aku terjumpa satu lagu by Anang - Separuh Jiwaku Pergi. Painful man, the message delivers smoothly that the partner cheats on him - Kris with another guy. Seems like he's fallen hard.
Talk about infidelity and cheating, aku dah masak (rasanya da cukup pengalaman) dengan perangai lelaki yang suka hati dorang je nak curang. Kenapa mesti berlaku curang kalo y'all dah pilih untuk commit dengan somebody? Takkan cinta yang dijaja semua tu tipu je? Kalo tipu je macam mana they all look into some girl's eyes and say I Love You? Weird. (because I can't)
But then, betullah kalo sesetengah orang cakap ada lelaki & ada permpuan yang tak ada hati perut. Bila Love Proverbs say 'Be with a person who loves you, not the person you love', still ada yang tinggalkan a good2 lover for another man/woman. Aku berfikir sendiri, kenapa semua ni jadi? Kenapa commit to a perfectly sacred bond and then betray it?
Walaupun nisbah yang curang/tipu ni lebih kurang je between lelaki+perempuan (aku rasa la) tapi yang selalu di highlight orang - lelaki. Sebab? Haa..lelaki yang banyak rosakkan perempuan bila commit in a relatonship. In terms of physically and emotionally as they sleep with the woman and leaves..
Damn it really hurts (for whoever has experience it, they know, I guess..)
Actng Mets
- missnoperfect
- KL+UPM, Silver State., Malaysia
- This is like my electronic diary. I write what I feel. I write when I'm sad, angry, upset. I whine, I mourn, I curse, I cry here. If you don't like it, or you just want to know how pathetic my life is and use it against me, DON'T read.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Friday, January 15, 2010
Who Am I?
Pagi ni, lepas aku visit ada satu kawan aku punya blog, ada dia buat personality test ni.. tiba2 aku tergerak hati nak buat test ni jugak..and here's the answer..can't really tell whether they're accurate or not..sebab aku ni manusia yang berubah2 emosi+pemikirannya..so, nothing much that I can say.
http://www.quizbox.com/personality/
Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.
The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education:
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.
What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.
Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
http://www.quizbox.com/personality/
Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.
The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education:
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.
What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.
Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
All-new year, All-new hopes.
2010. Sigh.. tak tau la apa nak di buat dengan tahun baru ni. Apa yang dah jadi tahun lepas buat aku tak ada mood nak sambut tahun baru ni. And seriously, aku macam tak rasa 2009. Feels like I was just blinking even macam2 benda jadi tahun lepas. Rasa macam nak reminisce balik pun ada. Mmm..
Let's see..
Awal tahun start semester macam biasa, and I was so really in love with my ex-boyfriend. And then on 28th of February (yes, I remember) I found his texting with another woman, bersayang2, ber-rindu2 plus siap ada gambar that woman lagi in his phone. I cried like hell and wonder why the fish he does that to me sedangkan I've done almost everything for him. Aku memang rasa macam mana keadaan frust menonggeng, makan tak lalu, mandi tak basah, tido pun tak berapa nak lena. Dalam masa 3 bulan, aku habiskan masa aku dengan pegi club, isap rokok macam nak gila sampai nak temuntah2 pastu study pun entah ke mana. Puas orang kat keliling aku nasihat lah, support lah, marah pun ada. Sebab? aku tak dapat nak lupakan dia. Siot betul.
And then, further in the year..
Pertangahan tahun, Mama kena post kat Perlis. OK la jugak, pasal aku fikir dia dapat tukar angin lepak kerja kat tempat yang can soothe her mind. When she's there, aku kat sini terus meronggeng almost every night dengan my clubbing partner, Dinda and sometimes Frankie - some guy who I stupidly thought can care for me. But he's just merely a stop-by.
And then.. by mid July aku dikenalkan oleh kawan aku Farah kat sorang mamat ni. We clicked well, he tells stories about his life and me listening. Then, after quite sometime (a few days only actually) we became an item, aku yang pop the question. Dia setuju. It went well until Ramadhan. Bila aku dapat tahu there's another woman. Aku confront dia, but he managed to get away with good excuses..
Until that another woman approached me on Facebook. We connect and tell the truth to each other. Tak disangka2, start dari bulan Ramadhan dia dah bercouple dengan perempuan tu, dan selama tu lah, dia tipu aku. By end of October, aku dapat strength untuk tinggal penipu tu (thanks to friends who cared and advised) and just get along with work, friends and new friends.
Then something about me and the abang angkat guy where there's this day when he confessed he wanted me to be his partner. Aku refuse mulanya, tapi bila aku nampak ada kesungguhan kat dia, aku fikir2..what the hell, just get on with it if he can make me happy. Cumanya, the ex kawan aku (or used to be lah) and dia berkata-kata yang aku ini the backstabber where aku sanggup rampas her fiancee. Mm.. aku tak tau lah nak cakap apa, cuma yang aku tau aku tak buat dia curang or tinggalkan the ex untuk aku. He just did that and sometime after the break-up we were together. Well, long as I'm happy aku tak nak bother pasal orang lain kecuali yang baik dengan aku, yang care about me. Those are enough for me.
New Year Eve - aku kerjaaaa.... *sigh*
Let's see..
Awal tahun start semester macam biasa, and I was so really in love with my ex-boyfriend. And then on 28th of February (yes, I remember) I found his texting with another woman, bersayang2, ber-rindu2 plus siap ada gambar that woman lagi in his phone. I cried like hell and wonder why the fish he does that to me sedangkan I've done almost everything for him. Aku memang rasa macam mana keadaan frust menonggeng, makan tak lalu, mandi tak basah, tido pun tak berapa nak lena. Dalam masa 3 bulan, aku habiskan masa aku dengan pegi club, isap rokok macam nak gila sampai nak temuntah2 pastu study pun entah ke mana. Puas orang kat keliling aku nasihat lah, support lah, marah pun ada. Sebab? aku tak dapat nak lupakan dia. Siot betul.
And then, further in the year..
Pertangahan tahun, Mama kena post kat Perlis. OK la jugak, pasal aku fikir dia dapat tukar angin lepak kerja kat tempat yang can soothe her mind. When she's there, aku kat sini terus meronggeng almost every night dengan my clubbing partner, Dinda and sometimes Frankie - some guy who I stupidly thought can care for me. But he's just merely a stop-by.
And then.. by mid July aku dikenalkan oleh kawan aku Farah kat sorang mamat ni. We clicked well, he tells stories about his life and me listening. Then, after quite sometime (a few days only actually) we became an item, aku yang pop the question. Dia setuju. It went well until Ramadhan. Bila aku dapat tahu there's another woman. Aku confront dia, but he managed to get away with good excuses..
Until that another woman approached me on Facebook. We connect and tell the truth to each other. Tak disangka2, start dari bulan Ramadhan dia dah bercouple dengan perempuan tu, dan selama tu lah, dia tipu aku. By end of October, aku dapat strength untuk tinggal penipu tu (thanks to friends who cared and advised) and just get along with work, friends and new friends.
Then something about me and the abang angkat guy where there's this day when he confessed he wanted me to be his partner. Aku refuse mulanya, tapi bila aku nampak ada kesungguhan kat dia, aku fikir2..what the hell, just get on with it if he can make me happy. Cumanya, the ex kawan aku (or used to be lah) and dia berkata-kata yang aku ini the backstabber where aku sanggup rampas her fiancee. Mm.. aku tak tau lah nak cakap apa, cuma yang aku tau aku tak buat dia curang or tinggalkan the ex untuk aku. He just did that and sometime after the break-up we were together. Well, long as I'm happy aku tak nak bother pasal orang lain kecuali yang baik dengan aku, yang care about me. Those are enough for me.
New Year Eve - aku kerjaaaa.... *sigh*
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